Screen time rules that transformed our family: Tamara’s positive parenting story
Tamara has always shared a close bond with her two daughters, aged 4 and 6.
“I’ve always had a great relationship with my daughters ...I’ve been their safe person who they can throw a big tantrum in front of and really let out their feelings,” Tamara said.
But as they grew, so did the parenting challenges. Tamara had found herself feeling frustrated, with constant mess and having to repeat herself.
“I noticed my daughters weren’t listening, especially when the TV was on. I would ask them a question, like ‘What would you like for breakfast?’ or ‘Please brush your teeth.’ I would need to ask them multiple times, and then I would get frustrated.
“I’m generally a patient person across the board, but I found that I was being a little impatient and feeling a little crankier than I would like to. I thought that wasn’t fair to my children,” Tamara said.
Tamara enrolled in Triple P Online to learn immediate, practical strategies.
“The Triple P program was free and the format was appealing – I could do it online and in my own time,” she said.
Tamara started seeing a difference straight away.
“My children’s responses to how I was managing different situations were so much better because I was calmer and they were too.”
Creating screen time rules with Triple P
Tamara’s new approach to screen time is a great example of how Triple P strategies translate into everyday parenting.
“I would be struggling with screen time if I didn’t have boundaries around how they use it,” she said.
In Tamara’s house, clear, consistent rules are in place, which is a fundamental idea in Triple P’s positive parenting program.
“I refer to our streaming service as ‘special TV’. They’re not allowed to watch it whenever they like because they seem to get more distracted with ‘special TV’. I only allow it in the afternoons or on the weekends,” said Tamara.
So, when it’s time to stop watching, Tamara learned how important it is to get close and calmly transition them.
“I can touch them on the shoulder to get their attention, turn the TV off, and say, ‘It’s time for bed now. Let’s go choose a story,’ and they do,” Tamara said.
There are also rules and consequences for using their tablet.
“We have a tablet, which they can only use for a reading app, and need to ask to use it. They can play games on this app if they want to, but they first need to complete tasks that improve their reading or math.
“Sometimes, my older daughter would start doing the reading app, then wander off and start opening different apps and things,” said Tamara.
“There’s an immediate consequence for this – the tablet gets taken off her. To start with, she would get upset because it’s a consequence that she didn’t like, but as I explained why it’s happening, she understood,” said Tamara.
Short consequences can help kids learn the rules. Your calm and predictable response helps children cope with those big feelings that can come with hearing, ‘No.’
Triple P’s parenting strategies brought Tamara’s family closer
Tamara believes that Triple P helped her strengthen her connection with her daughters while handling challenges more effectively.
“I responded more calmly and effectively. So, they naturally engaged with me more positively,” said Tamara.
“I highly recommend Triple P Online. It’s tailored to each person and what each parent or carer wants to work on,” Tamara said.
Tamara’s top 3 Triple P parenting strategies
- Listen to your child. Be present. Actively listen.
- Be that calm person for your child. Be the person your child wants to come to and feel safe.
- It’s not a good idea to dive in straightaway. Take a moment. Calm yourself before going in to try and calm the situation.
Triple P’s structured, online parenting course
Triple P Online: Children and Screens can help you guide your child to safely explore the digital world.
Sign up for the free online program now.
